The Killing Game

wow! Thanks for the i shove it down your throat and you choke to death,
Here has a piece of paper.

 

Wow super usefull. I make a blade out of my abnormally long nails and stab you repeatedly.

I search your pockets and find a tennis ball to the next person.

 

I ram the tennis ball up your ass and have payed male hookers decimate you with it.

Here's a Small ball of pocket lint.

 

I find 3 more pocket lints and I make an axe disguised as a lollipop.

I bludgeon you to death with it.

Here, have a spoon.

 

I take the spoon, claw your eyes out with it, crack open your skull with my BEAR HANDS and have a brain-icecream with your lovely spoon. Well, whatever amount is left there.

Oi you, down there, take this Dishwasher, I don't need it!

 

No, but you need a damned wash!

I shove you into the dishwasher, using a plasma welder, I seal it and dump you into the sea!

I do believe I left that plasma welder laying somewhere, I do hope no one decides to .. make use of it.

 

I find the plasma wielder somewhere on the floor. I stalk you to your house and wait until you fall asleep then I stick the wielder into your ear and fry your brain.

But I think I forgot my stove outside. Well someone will take it I guess.

 

I carefully place your face on the largest stove ring, sit on it to secure it, then slowly increase the heat laughing at the screaming. Cool down with water occasionly to make sure the death is slow enough.

Take the empty water jug :3

 

I piss inside the canister and take all the pills I can find, then proceed to put your head inside it.
Submerged, you have no other choice to either drown or swallow the deadly piss-cocktail.

Looking at AJ's Body I find a rope.....meh, not useful.

 

I find some rope and an unsuspecting person next to a dead body. I sneak up on him and tie him up. I pour him with a bottle of gasoline that I just hapened to have in my jacket pocket and light him on fire while laughing like a retarded goat.

I forgot a pair of speakers next to his body though.

 

Taking the speakers, I rewire them to record sound.

I place them behind this guy who is 'laughing like a retarded goat' and hit record.

Later on, he finds himself stuck in an exitless room which is echoing the laugh over and over - eventually madness over takes him, after several days, all that remains is a vegetable of a former man!

I think I'll just put down my book o' spells over here, I need a drink.

 

thanks for the book of spells, i go to a pub and just happened to meet you there, i rip out pages of the book and give you millions of paper cuts then later on after hitting you around the head with the book, you die. I think i left the page about summoning the dead... behind.

 

I stumble upon this piece of paper in a bar that contains information about how to summon the dead. Seems interesting. I say a few words, dance around a bit and in front of me appears a ressurected JFK. I tell him to hunt you down with a machine gun. The rest is history.

I did forget a chainsaw at the bar though.

 

With the chainsaw I will cut you're ass off so you can't sit without having a new ass.

And i did leave a copy of Big Rigs: Over the road racing

 

Takes the game and shatters the disk leaving a jagged edge, then slits your throat with it.

As I left an ice cube fell out for the next person.

 

I take the ice cube and place it on the stairs to your apartment.
As you come home from your throat-slittery business, you walk up the stairs to your apartment.
Unprepared, you slip on the now melted ice-cube and D-D-D-DROP your face down the stairs, with your body attached to it.
Unfortunatly on the way down, you happen to break multiple bones, so there you are, a broken sack of calcium at the bottom of the stairs, slowly dying a bleeding death.

Satisfied with my work, I drop a salt shaker next to you, and grab myself a drink at the bar that that one guy got murdered at (Hey, the drinks are off 50%!)

 

I stumble upon this random salt shaker lying in an apartment of some dead guy I just robbed. With my super snifing powers I find out who left it there. I track you down, and make you eat all of the salt at once. You die of stomach failure as I take your drink and leave the bar.
Oh, and I left a present to the one that searches your body first. It's a box filled with glitter.

 

I take the box filled with glitter and find the guy who stole the drink, inject the glitter into his stomach lining and watch him suffer from multiple internal bleeding injuries, satisfied that hes dead I walk away, leaving his beer coaster behind to whoever is looking.

 

I smash the bottle and smash into onto your mouth. I then attach your anus to your mouth, and smash it again on both of those.

Person below, have a door...

Spoiler

Wow! I didn't expect this to go this far... I thought it would die. Thanks y'all

 

What bottle he gave you the coaster that the bottle is usually placed upon (the rectangular piece of wood.)

I take the door and make it into a bow and some arrows and shoot you, i think i left an arrow...